It's hard to fathom that my baby boy Zach started HIGH SCHOOL today. Well, he isn't technically my baby but he's the baby of my oldest 3 boys so he is one of my baby boys. Make sense? Not really? Yeah, I know but trust me.. he really is!
Zach was a total, absolute, HOLY SHIT pregnancy. My marriage was falling apart and another baby was the last thing I had planned. The pregnancy was super easy and delivery a breeze but 2 days after he was born I developed a high fever (105) and was readmitted to the hospital for the next 9 days. I was terrified and seriously thought I was dying. My doctor pulled a few strings and they actually allowed Zach to stay in the room with me once I was stabilized. His dad would come every day after work, my mom would be there before work (and after) but during the day Zach would lay on my chest...aaalllll day long. Few distractions, no older siblings to need my attention - just Zach and I laying in the hospital bed. He would lay there and look at me and sleep and the child never cried. He cooed but never cried. He was the best baby I could have ever dreamed of having. He had a special, soothing, calming, sweet, almost heavenly like aura. I can not explain the calming effect that child had on me. I'm a very anxious, high strung person but as soon as I touched him, I was calmed. Zach and I developed a special bond that has never waivered.
When Zach was 2 years old, his father and I separated - a major guilt factor for me but it was something that had to be done. Maybe because he only remembers "me" always being there strengthens our bond? Maybe my guilt and level of protection I have with him strengthens our bond? Maybe, maybe not. Regardless, Zach has been right there with his mommy through a lot of "stuff" and has always been my baby boy.
Once of my favorite Zach stories: When he was younger, like a lot of little boys, he always told me he wanted to marry me one day. His reason? He wanted to marry me so he could sleep in my bed and cuddle every single night. He now denies and cringes every time I tell that story but that tells you what a sweet, kind soul he is.
Fast Forward 15 years.... Zach's first day of High School is today. I'm so excited for him and it's such a milestone for him (and for me). He's now attending a private, Christian school and he has such wonderful things ahead of him! His love of the Lord inspires me daily. Zach wanted to go to a Christian school because he wanted a place where he was surrounded by kids that also lived their life to fulfill their God-given purpose. He was appalled at the things his "friends" were doing at his other school and wanted no part. That... that is my Zach. (and OK, he was also excited to be a part of a winning sports team, unlike the public high school!)
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| Zach's First Day of High School 8/16/2010 |
There is no doubt that my kind, sweet child will do wonderful things in his life and I have never been more proud to be his mom.
